I always love when the subject of sex comes up with my clients. I’m always happy to hear of them having sex especially when in long term relationships. I’ve been told by some, it’s silly to think people stop having sex when they’re in long relationships, but know from “the horse’s mouth”, that in a lot of relationships, it’s true.
My client was in the other day who happens to own and run a local adult sex toy and lingerie business. They have all the normal things you think you would find, clothes, sex toys, creams, lubes, movies, magazines, etc. They also offer a booth service in the bacd where you can pay to watch movies with other patrons. It turns out she tells me that a lot of her clients are professional men that come in their suits and ties after working all day. Some purchase and wear the woman’s clothes they sell, and some are into their more fetish line of clothing. A lot of them just happen to be wearing their wedding rings when they do these things.
Of course there’s a grouping of people that also wearing their wedding rings and are also engaged more in the gay and or bisexual area of the store and videos.
I guess I find it a shame that these people, and many more out there, feel they can’t talk to the one person they are supposed to be the closest to. Their spouse. Why is sex considered so dirty and secretive? Why can’t we as humans embrace our sexuality and celebrate it? It’s differences and individualities? The more we hide it away, or not talk about it, the more it’s unacceptable and perverse.
I can understand how one would think that maybe it’s just my perception, but I often hear from my clients that they wish their spouses would do things differently in the bedroom, and know that this is not uncommon thinking. The amount of sex, the kind of sex, what time of the day one likes sex over the other.. It goes on and on.
I also have a client that had no problem telling me that her husband liked her to use sex toys on him during sex. He was also a client. I was happily surprised that they had that level of communication between them. They divorced years later and was sad for the wife because he decided he was “done” before really giving her an opportunity to maybe try to “fix” their relationship. She even told me if he wanted, she would have allowed him to possibly be with other partners, or bring a third into their bedroom. She loved him and was willing to expand what needed to be expanded to make the relationship work.
I know society teaches us to keep what goes on in the bedroom, IN the bedroom, but it might also be good to allow a healthy sex life back into our lives. From topics of conversation, to recommendations of product.
What do you think?